Sunday, January 18, 2009

My Sunday Lunch

Today I had a haggis for lunch, served up with neeps and tatties. It was a genuine, mutton-based haggis, too, enclosed in a sheep's stomach. None of that Sainsburys/M&S, plastic-wrapped, pork-based crap for me, thank you very much. Furthermore, I poured a wee dram of Scotch over the top to ensure authenticity. And now I shall spend the rest of the afternoon drinking the rest of the bottle.

Anyway, the point is, if I had eaten two of the things, some people might have said that I'd consumed two “haggises”. Well fuck them. I have decided that haggis is a fifth form declension Latin noun, therefore the nominative plural is “hagges”. Then again, given that the word is clearly a triliteral and, as a result, quite possibly Arabic in origin, another possible plural is haggisaan (حجسان)- the dual nominative. (Except, of course, when the dual is the direct object of the verb, that dual then takes the accusative, giving us haggisayn (حجسين).)

Be warned.


Gorilla Bananas said...

In the gorilla tongue that would be Hoogers.

Joe Slavko said...

It sounds Flemish. Gorillas are obviously more migratory than I'd imagined.

Anonymous said...

The plural form may be found on the OT. It is Haggai.